Or at least stop talking about baseball.
This isn't a picture taken at the wrong time, this is what his face always looks like.
Why so harsh, you ask? It’s because I know as well as you do that Colin Cowherd is googling himself every five minutes (and that can be taken in any way you want), he is an idiot and I want him to know it. During a commercial on Dale and Holley on Tuesday I switched over twice to hear him blather on alone (haven’t they realized that one guy on the radio talking is not interesting, especially when he’s Colin Cowherd and has his head so far up his ass that his voice is muffled) about stupid shit. I know it was dumb to switch over in the first place but there are only so many times that you can hear about how windshields are made from two pieces of safety glass with a sheet of plastic between them.
We're just better than you.
Anyways, in the three minutes I listened to him I managed to hear two things that made me think that ESPN should bring in two monkeys to fill his time slot because the sound of them throwing feces at eachother is smarter than what he had to say. First he was talking about baseball stadiums and said that Fenway Park is only cool to people who don’t go there every day (he used school teachers in Iowa as his example), and that real Red Sox fans are clamoring for a new ballpark. Um, Colin, have you noticed that there have been 470-something consecutive sellouts at Fenway? Have you noticed that we have been making fun of the New Yankee Stadium for being a cookie cutter ballpark with the charm of an elephant turd? And when was the last time you were at Fenway or had a conversation about it with someone who does hold season tickets or goes all the time? I’m in that park 20 times a season and I would be livid if they built a new one.
This was one of the first images to come up when I Googled you Colin. What does that tell you?
Then he suggested that the US lost to Japan in the WBC beacuse of discipline (disciprin). No, it was because Cole Hamels, Tim Lincecum, Josh Beckett, FatAss Sabathia and Jon Lester didn’t pitch, many of the US’s top position players were out and teams (and fans) in the States are more concerned with the upcoming season than an exhibition tournament, no mater how cool it is. In Japan, Korea, Cuba and The Netherlands, this is all they have, the chance to prove that they are the best in the world. In the U.S. our players do it every day. If a team featuring the best American players in midseason form were to match up with any team on the planet, the US would win any seven game series. It wasn’t disciprin that helped the Japanese beat us, it’s that to them this is the most important tournament in the world and they had all hands on deck, while Davy Johnson’s club had a bunch of leftovers that were healthy and whose teams were willing to let them go instead of the best players that our nation has to offer. disciprin is well and good, but talent will beat it at this level.
I will admit that I have never listened to an entire show of “the Herd” (get off it Colin, you are one guy, and you don’t have enough listeners to even call them a herd), but if he sounds this stupid in a couple minutes during Dale and Holley’s commercials then why would I. He may know plenty about other sports, or even things outside of sports, but he should leave baseball to people who didn’t ride the short bus to work.
Go Sox.
Done.
Colin Cowherd is a complete tool. They should give me and Ball Four the time slot so that we can spend four hours a day making fun of him and letting him know how bad he is at his job. His ESPN bio says that he won Nevada sportscaster of the year five times. That is like being the skinniest kid in fat camp for five years running. He would last about 15 minutes on WEEI and then run back to Vegas crying.
I occaisionally listened to cowherd last fall during travel/recruiting season when i was in the new york area because i CANT STAND new york local sports talk. So even though he is a pompous tool, he is still better than listening to a mets fan talk about how carlos beltran is gonna win MVP.
that being said, hilarious post Done… i hate hearing about replacment windshields too.
Cowherd is better than any radio personality you listen to. That is why radio stations are picking up his show all over the US. It is also why he is getting a tv show on espn 2. He just doesn’t give baseball the respect all you baseball nerds think it deserves. the sports might be 3rd or 4th for pro sports as far as tv ratings go and he doesn’t hold that back. Quit crying about Colin, he has a great show.
Dane, How do you know what personalities he listens to? Where are you from that Colin Cowherd is the best you have to listen to? And Barry Bonds once had a show on ESPN 2, so pretty much anybody can. Please go drink drain cleaner.
Oh Dane. You have clearly entered unfriendly territry (yes, jack ass, i know it’s spelled wrong, pronounce it like an amuuuurican) so just try and learn from this online experience. Colin EssForBrains is indeed a tool. And a funny faced one at that. I can’t stand that he calls his listeners the herd, I’m not a sheep, I think you suck, and I don’t listen to you. Yes I understand the literary play, yes, he is still a schmuck for it. It has nothing to do with his programming, it has to do that i can’t stand listening to that jackass for hours on end. Dane, go to WEEI.com at any point during the day, click the “listen live” button, admit you are wrong (and that you are probably from some suck hole tier 7 city), and drink draino. Oh look at that, Nacho and I agree. Bottoms up, chum.
I love how every blogger hates Colin when he does exactly what you all do. State opinions that rile other people up. He just doesn’t do it from his moms basement while eating cheetos and hot pockets. There is a reason why his show is the highest rated in history in his timeslot and why ESPN just gave him a 4-year deal. The only reason your blog ever gets read is when people search for Colin’s name in Google. What a loser you are. You should thank the man. BTW, your writing is horrible.
Jason, you google, and are on a first named basis, with Colin Cowherd?
Loser.
Nope, I was just looking up when his new TV show was comming on. Heard about it on Mike and Mike this morning. Now I got to get back to work, you know, at a real job. BTW, I think your pop tarts are done.
Cowherd sucks.
MOM, MORE PROTEIN SHAKES, I SAID!!!
PLEASE KILL KEVIN KOWHERD. THAT PIECE OF SHIT SERIOUSLY NEEDS TO SHUT THE HELL UP. I’M SORRY FOR USING ALL KAPS AND MISPELLING WORDS AND MISPUNCTUATING SENTENCES AND MISUSING GRAMMAR AS MY KEYBOARD IS JAMMED AND I’M IN SPECIAL ED. I MAY BE DUMB BUT I’M NOT DUMB ENOUGH TO THINK THAT THERE IS ANY SEMBLANCE OF INTELLIGENCE IN HIS HOLLOW COBWEBBED SKULL. HE WAS PROBABLY PICKED ON THE MOST IN SCHOOL AND HE WAS PROBABLY SUCH A BIG DORK THAT EVEN OTHER DORKS DIDN’T LIKE HIM. SERIOUSLY, I WATCH HIS STUPID SHOW EVERY DAY BECAUSE ESPN2 IS THE ONLY CHANNEL I GET. WE ARE POOR BECAUSE I DON’T HAVE A JOB SO WE CAN ONLY AFFORD BASIC BASIC BASIC CABLE SO WE ONLY HAVE LIKE 4 TOTAL CHANNELS. PLUS I DON’T KNOW HOW TO TURN THE TV OFF SO I HAVE TO WATCH THAT AWFUL SHOW EVERY DAY. MICHELLE AT LEAST MAKES IT WATCHABLE AND I WISH SHE WOULD RIDICULE THAT MONKEY MORE. SHE’S WAY TOO NICE TO THAT SORRY EXCUSE FOR A PERSON. ONE DAY SHE NEEDS TO COME IN AND JUST TELL HIM HOW RIDICULOUS HE IS AND HOW HE’S NOT FUNNY AND HOW THAT FAGGOT HAS NO HOPE OF ATTRACTING ANY WOMEN. SERIOUSLY, I AM LIKE EMBARRASSED TO BE OF THE SAME SPECIES AS THAT MORON. NOW THAT’S SAYING A LOT CONSIDERING HOW INEPT I AM. BUT IT’S NOT MY FAULT CUZ MY PARENTS ARE SIBLINGS. FOR REAL THOUGH, THAT STUPID, IGNORANT, DIPSHIT NEEDS TO JUST GIVE UP. NO ONE LIKES HIM, NO ONE THINKS HE’S FUNNY, NO ONE THINKS HE’S COOL, AND NO ONE THINKS HE’S ANYTHING BUT THE BIGGEST FUCKING LOSER ON THIS PLANET. AND IF ANYONE DOES, HE/SHE/IT NEEDS TO DIE TOO. BUT I REALLY DOUBT ANYONE WITH THE MENTALITY OF AT LEAST A 5 YEAR OLD COULD POSSIBLY FIND ANYTHING HE SAYS EVEN REMOTELY INTERESTING. EVERYTIME I SEE HIS UGLY FACE, I GET THE IRRESISTIBLE URGE TO KILL SOMEONE, NAMELY HIM. HE BELONGS IN THE SAME CATEGORY AS JIM ROME, EVERYONE ON AND RELATED TO THE TV SHOW SCRUBS, AND 90% OF ALL NEWS ANCHORS AND PERSONALITIES ON FOX NEWS CHANNEL.
SO I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT COLIN COWHERD IS A GIANT PIECE OF POOP. I HOPE HE DIES IN A FIRE.
THANKS FOR READING,
MY NAME IS RON AND I MOW THE LAWN
Everyone knows Cowherd never played an organized sport in his life because they are always the people who make the most idiotic comments about sports athletes and teams. I mean everything he says could be said by any joe schmo in the country. For example, the PTI guys have intelligent conversation that may actually teach fans a thing or two. Cowherd is the drunk guy you talk to about sports at last call…and even that guy will know a lot more than Cowherd
I listen to his show everyday at work, but honestly only because I like the rest of the guys on ESPN radio so I just don’t bother changing the station. Also, in my office the reception isn’t always good so I don’t want to risk changing the station and then not getting the reception back. But the more I listen to him the more I can’t stand him. He can’t go one day without trying to focus the show on himself and his own life. People don’t tune into sports talk shows to hear how great the host is and how everything he does in his life is so smart. He is a pompass, annoying egomaniac and he taks down to everyone. On top of that, my biggest complaint is that he is full of shit. Before the NFL season he claimed to be 60-65% on his picks over the past 2 years. Of course, there is no source to prove this claim. So every Friday, he picks 7 football games vs the spread. Not surprisingly, he picked less than 40% of the games corect this year. His excuse, “that’s because I try to pick the toughest games and not easy ones like non-bcs conference games. What a joke. Then, earlier this week he stated that he picked 6 out of the 8 division winners in the NFL and how easy the NFL is to predict. When he originally made his preseason picks, I wrote them down just to see how my predictions did vs his. He actually only picked 3 out of the 8 and maybe 4 if Philly wins this weekend. So he just outright lied to all of the viewers like I’m sure he did with his 60-65% winning percentage the past 2 years. I pray every day that ESPN fires him or his tongue fals out.
I love how when Colin was only on espn radio he always talked about how “ripped” and “inshape” he was because he was always at the gym working out…. then he got his tv show and he is a skinny, baldin and receding, dork…. He has the stupidest opinions and backs them up with even more stupid analogies… What a fucking loser….
Cowturd is a two-faced hack. When LeBron James was in Cleveland, he used to talk about how Kobe was better than him and how LeBron was a bit overrated. The second LeBron threw The City of Cleveland under The Bus, Cowturd changed his tune. Now he talks about LeBron as if he were Jesus Christ. Cowturd is the Media Equivilent of the Front Running, Bandwagon Jumping “Fan”. (You all know the type.)
I used to listen to Cowturd just to note the crap that would come out of his mouth, but then one morning, he actually tried to compare LeBron to Martin Luther King, Jr. When he did that, I turned the station and haven’t listened to him since.
Today on SportsNation, EA Sports will announce who will be on the cover of Madden ’12. Cowturd is probably cringing at the tought of a Cleveland Sports Figure (Peyton Hillis) being on the cover.