I’m not a great yugoogulizer, but bear with me. I’m only going to reference the giant kick to the testicles administered to me a few days ago by the now defunct 2009 Red Sox once. I will say that it was a good, if extremely frustrating season, one that could just as well have ended up in the shitheap along with 2002, 2006 and pretty much the entire decade of the 1990s (hold your horses Mr. “what about 99.” The Sox had no realistic shot in that series unless Pedro had been able to pitch seven times), or could have ended with assholes like me diving into the river to get closer to the duckboats. What we got, as it turns out, is somewhere in the middle. A decent team that won 95 games, was streaky as all get out and gave us more great memories at the start of the year than the end. They backed into the playoffs, came up against a “Team of Destiny” (we should all know not to bet against a team that lost a guy early in the season, it’s just common sense), and got thrashed in the worst way possible.
Time to Hand Tito the Ball and Walk Away.
This winter will be busier than usual for Theo and Co on Yawkey Way. They need to add a bat, keep Jason “I should have been given a five year, $80 million deal in June” Bay, and figure out what to do with the rapidly fading David Ortiz, Mike Lowell and Jonathan Papelbon. Yes, I did just say that Papelbon was fading. Yes, I did mean it. The Angels were more worried about facing Bard last week than Paps, and we all know that closers have expiration dates. The collapse at the end of Sunday’s game was just the last gasp of a season which he spent constantly teetering over the edge between being Mariano Rivera and Heathcliff Slocumb. If he can be used to get Adrian Gonzalez, Felix Hernandez, or anyone else that will have a significant impact on the 2010 Sox and beyond (see Sabathia, Fat Ass and Teixeira, Leigh) then Theo should jump at the opportunity. Especially with a rookie that throws 100 out there behind him. (this is not a snap judgement made after Sunday. It is a decision that I came to after many long conversations with my friends Johnny Walker, Sam Adams and Whateverhisnamewas Pabst.)
Please keep this man in town.
The top priority has to be Bay, a guy who the Yankees will throw more money than the annual budget of most public schools at, and making him the centerpiece of the lineup, along with Beardzilla and Pedroia, for the next five or more years. If they cheap out on this one I am going to walk into John Henry’s office and take a crap on his desk. Seriously. The man can afford it, and the fans need something to get excited about after the debacle that was last year’s offseason. The other priority should be figuring out how much it will cost to keep Joe Mauer away from Pinstripes (I know that they wear them in Minnesota, but that’s different), and work on turning Victor into a full time first baseman for 2011. (How nice would an opening day lineup of Ells, Pedroia, Mauer, Youk, Vic, Bay, any DH other than this year’s David Ortiz, Drew and Gonzo for 2011 look? Yeah) Another bat for 2010 might be nice too, and you can be sure that Theo will find some scrap heap pitchers to add to the top four of Lester, Beckett, Buck and Daisuke. We can only hope that Wake can come back from the surgery to be the guy he was before he got hurt this year, and solidify the back end of that rotation, reducing then necessity for those reclamation projects which never work.
As we all slowly recover from a stomach punch of a Sunday afternoon, let’s just think back to the two World Series Titles that we have gotten to witness (two more than I ever thought I’d see in my lifetime, and I’m young enough that that is tremendously depressing), and the fact that most fans out there would give their left testicles for a season like we just saw. As extremely streaky and frustrating as the 2009 Sox were, they were ours and they gave us a hell of a ride.
124 Days.
Go Sox.
Done.
