The Last E is for "Extra Stupid"
So apparently Tiger Woods nailed a skank from my guiltiest pleasure ever, Tool Academy. Of Course, upon hearing this news, I joined my old friend wikipedia, in a search for exactly who this bag of used tampons is and what impact she had on the show.
Jaimee's Tool
As it turns out, she was not only one of the ten women who were stupid enough to stay with guys who needed to go on the show, but the most pitiful of them all. See, what had happened was that she got on the show with her “boyfriend” Shawn (also known as Loud-Mouth Tool) who was the dictionary definition of a douchebag, from the Flock of Seagulls haircut to the acid washed jeans and ripped t-shirts. He then proceeded to make himself known to bet he biggest tool on the show (planet) and pick fights with about half of the other tools. However, before the guy could even get himself “expelled,” his other girlfriend showed up. He had been dating this other, equally dysfunctional, chick ( and I’m not using the words chick and hooker and skank to demean all women, just these ones) for about six years and Miss Grubbs (aka the Tigerf#$%er) just got stuck in the middle of it.
You might want to just slit your throat with that now.
The long and short of it is that Jamie Grubbs, one of Tiger Woods’ many, many mistresses, was the most pitiful hooker on a TV show which I love to watch to make my finacee feel better about the fact that I’m not one of those people. She got dumped by a guy who was enough of a douche to get taken on Tool Academy, and it was while he was still on the show. (At the reunion show this guy showed up with the two girls who he had been on the show with, who both hate him, and a third chick who is having his baby and wants nothing to do with him. This proves that VH1 is the ultimate way to attract trash of all kinds.)
In the end, am I surprised by the fact that Tiger likes the whores? No, but I am surprised that he would go fo these chicks when he could be nailing supermodels on the side. The lesson in this is not to let your wife find out that you are leaving home to nail some chick who is uglier than her at 1 am on Thanksgiving Night, especially when there are plenty of blunt objects around with which she can strike you in the face.
Go Elin, Go Sox.
78 Days.
Done.
